Breaking up at Christmas: Australian singles reveal whether they’d rather be dumped before or after

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Australian singles are divided over whether it is better to be dumped before or after Christmas.

Perth dating coach Louanne Ward posed the question in a Facebook group, 10 days before December 11 – the most common day for couples to break up each year.

‘As we approach the end of a stressful year with so many added pressures, and December being one of the highest break up months statistically, this question has passed the minds of many: should I do it now or should I wait?’ Ms Ward wrote.

While most said ‘sooner rather than later’ is the best course of action for anyone feeling unhappy in their relationship, some had a materialistic motive for sticking together over the holiday season: they still want presents.

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‘Have your arguments or disappointments today, get on with the rest of your life tomorrow,’ one man replied.

‘Don’t wait! There is no such thing as the “right timing”,’ a woman added.

Another called waiting ‘both cowardly and unfair’.

Many felt splitting before Christmas would save not only money, but a lot of distress.

‘If I found out he was planning to do it without discussing it with me – I would do it for him before Christmas and save money on the gift! No question about that,’ a woman said.

But one man joked: ‘Just give me the gifts first.’

Others argued that every relationship is different, especially when one partner is from overseas.

‘It’s circumstantial,’ one woman said.

‘My brother [broke up with his girlfriend] just before Christmas and her parents were coming over from Austria to meet our family. Made for an awkward Christmas for all involved.’

Another said ‘definitely after’ the holiday period but did not offer any explanation for her reasoning.

The debate comes days after Ms Ward divided the country by asking Australians if there is ever a ‘right way’ to end a relationship, or whether calling things off will always be upsetting for at least one of those involved.

‘Breaking it off or being broken up with is never easy. Is there a right way?’ Ms Ward wrote in her Facebook group, She Said He Said.

While some said honesty is always the best policy, a surprising number supported ghosting – the cruel approach of cutting off all communication without any explanation.

‘Ghost them as the norm is just to ignore the person and then they will get the picture,’ one man replied.

‘[Ghosting] avoids stalking – simply just disappear, magic,’ another added.

A third had a similarly blunt take: ‘Don’t talk to them ever again.’ 

But a fourth saw the issue from both sides.

‘In an ideal world you would hope for common decency and respect – but let’s face it break ups majority of the time are at a saturation point of toxicity,’ he said.

‘My advice, once it’s done, block ALL forms of contact preventing those calls at 1am that potentially could make you weak.

‘If it wasn’t right the first or second time, the next time is going to be exactly the same.’

But not everyone agreed, with some calling for common decency and citing an in-person break up as the only respectful way to split.

‘Respect is an absolute. Face to face conversation is a must. Always remember to treat others how you want to be treated,’ one man replied. 

Others argued that ending the relationship over the phone or via text message is the safest course of action.

‘Definitely avoid in person if you think there is a risk of the other person being violent towards you,’ one woman said.

Some felt the face to face versus phone dilemma should be determined by the length of the relationship.

‘Say you don’t want to see them anymore, maybe phone or in person depending on the time you were together,’ one woman said.